Am I in a Healthy Relationship?
Am I in a healthy relationship? Great question! This doesn’t always have a great, easy, clean cut answer though. Let’s dig deeper!
Relationships are such an important part of the human experience, but all relationships have the potential to become unhealthy. It’s important to check in on your relationships (romantic and otherwise) often to see how they are doing. Are they healthy relationships or have they become unhealthy or even dangerous?
What to Look for in a Healthy Relationship
· Mutual respect
· Trust
· Honesty
· Support
· Fairness/Equality
· Separate Identities
· Good Communication
· A sense of playfulness/fondness
Signs of a Healthy Relationship:
You take care of yourself, and have self esteem independent of your relationship
Both partners maintain their own identity, and respect each other’s individuality.
Partners have activities apart from one another
You are able to express yourselves to one another without fear of consequences
Feel secure and comfortable
Allow and encourage other relationships
Partners take interest in one another’s activities
There is no violence or concern about abuse or violence in the relationship
Trust and honesty
Have the option of privacy
There is respect for sexual boundaries and honesty about sexual activity
Relationships are give and take; allowing your partner to influence you is important; this can be especially difficult for some men
Disagreements are part of even healthy relationships, but how conflict is handled is important. Fighting fairly is an important skill to help you have healthier relationships.
Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship:
Do you:
Feel that your partner tries to isolate you from friends/family?
always put your partner first, neglecting yourself or your own needs?
Feel pressure to change who you are for the other person?
Feel worried when you disagree with the other person?
Feel pressure to quit activities you usually/used to enjoy?
Pressure the other person into agreeing with you or changing to suit you better?
Notice only one of you has to justify your actions (e.g., where you go, who you see)?
Notice one partner feels obligated to have sex or has been forced?
Have a lack of privacy, and may be forced to share everything with the other person?
You or your partner refuse to use safer sex methods?
Notice arguments are not settled fairly?
Experience yelling or physical violence during an argument?
Attempt to control or manipulate each other?
Notice your partner attempts to controls how you dress and criticizes your behaviors?
Make time to spend with one another?
Have no common friends, or have a lack of respect for each other’s friends and family?
Notice an unequal control of resources (e.g., food, money, home, car, etc.)?
Experience a lack of fairness and equality (relationship is one sided where one partner has majority of power, gets the “final say” in most decisions, and/or the relationship focuses mainly on the needs of only one partner?
When should you get help? No relationship is perfect, but there are some signs that you might need professional help.
Signs you might need to get professional help:
Your partner has harmed or threatened to harm you physically or sexually
You are afraid he/she may harm you physically or sexually
You know you are unhappy, but are unsure what to do about it
Your relationship consistently has 1 or more of the signs of an unhealthy relationship
You are afraid to end the relationship
And remember, even a healthy relationship can be stressed when faced with an unexpected or suspected pregnancy. We are here to help you get the information you need to make the best choice for everyone involved.
If you are concerned about your relationship Parkridge might be able to help.
Call: 806.794.8555
Resources
Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationships. Hall Health Center. Available at: http://depts.washington.edu/hhpccweb/health-resource/healthy-vs-unhealthy-relationships/ Accessed on: June 15, 2020.
Is it Love? Live on Point. Available at: https://store.liveonpoint.org/materials/BBP-003.html Accessed on: June 15, 2020.
